How could you do that to your own best friends? All of this time they always be there for you when you feels so stressed with your family condition. When your father have an affair behind your mother back, we were there for you. To make sure that you stay your head up and acts like it is nothing for you and make sure you still okay. Now, you talking behind our back at your Twitter account and the next day you still have a confidence to come to meet us? Did you know that you look like a social-climbing person? Talk about the high social ranking with us and acts like you knows everything about them. Excuse me, did you know that they even hate you. Oh god, wake up girl! Almost everyone in our batch hate you. Do you think behind those pretty innocent face you can hide your dark side? Everybody know that you are a bad-mouth person. Please, know your position. Open you eyes widely and you will see that almost everyone don't want to be friend with a girl like you.
When a some boys like you, you said eww? Hey, you even flirting with them. You said it's kind of awkward if you not reply they text. You gives them hope. You make them believes that they still have a chance. Stop doing that. You judge people and you can't accept when people judge you. If you can't accept a judgement, don't you dare to start judging people. You always worried about your face. It's okay but when you doing the same thing all over again it's annoying okay? When your ex's move on with someone else, you said you didn't care, but actually you did. What the hell wrong with you? You already told us you move on and didn't care if he already have a girlfriend or not. You hate almost all pretty girls in our batch and you will spot they dark side and tells everybody about it. You feel insecure when all of the attentions is not you anymore don't you? Social-climbing is the last thing on my list. It's looked like you're so desperate for a position in society. Get a life! Judging a person does not defines who they are but it defines who you are. Oh, by the way, didn't you notice that I don't talk with you too much like before. And lately I just hopes there just four of us and it is without you. I'm not a hypocrites. If I started to hate someone I will never talk to them ever again. Please, don't make me hate you. Take note please.
XOXO, E.
Thursday, July 4
Sunday, June 16
Unconditional love.
There is one young man, he's in love with his brother fiance. Truly, madly and deeply in love. After a few month later, his brother died in a car accident. His mom force him to take over his brother place because she knew all of this while that he is in love with his brother fiance since she accidentally read his diary when she cleaned his bedroom. At first he refuses to engage with her because he knows that he will always be a shadows of his brother and also he knows that she will never love him. But then, they agreed. It is all because of his mom.
For his mom sake he rather let his heart hurt. They engaged for a year. He wait patiently until she accept him but she still the same. Crying over her dead fiance. She treat him as cold as winter wind. His unconditional love for her make him blind that he will never be her love of her life. He doesn't even know why he acts like don't care what she did to him. Everything she did to hurt him seems useless. Because he love her, he doesn't care about his heart at all.
After a year, they finally married. She still the same. They never slept together in a bed. He will sleep on the floor. She never cooked for him. He always tell his best friend that he can't do it any longer. His heart hurts so much. She only talk to him when she need something. Yet, she still want to divorce with him. She know that she will never love him, rather than hurting his heart non-stop she will back off. He kneel down on his knees begging for her to take back what she have said. She want to go out of the house. He just said she can stay in the house and just let he go out of his own house.
Everyday he will sleep in the car to watch over her so that he knows that his wife safe being alone in the house. One day, on his way back home he saw his wife out from a car with another man. His best friend. He stops his car and just look at them with an empty mind. After all of this time he told his best friend about his feeling. How could he do this to him. Everything makes sense to him now. No wonder his best friend encouraged him to divorce just because he said he couldn't see he gets hurt. No wonder his wife want a divorce also.
His heart falls into pieces. Feels betrayed. He swear that he will never looked back. His pain is his wife happiness. He confront his wife and they finally divorce. He just hopes that his wife will be find her happiness that she never found before. Now, he will leave his past behind and never look back at his past. With a heart fulls of bloody scars, he accept the fact that you can't force someone to love you even though you love them unconditionally. Now, he just need to moves on with his life and maybe he will find someone that cure his heart and love him unconditionally. You can't have everything you want. You just need to move on.
xoxo, E.
For his mom sake he rather let his heart hurt. They engaged for a year. He wait patiently until she accept him but she still the same. Crying over her dead fiance. She treat him as cold as winter wind. His unconditional love for her make him blind that he will never be her love of her life. He doesn't even know why he acts like don't care what she did to him. Everything she did to hurt him seems useless. Because he love her, he doesn't care about his heart at all.
After a year, they finally married. She still the same. They never slept together in a bed. He will sleep on the floor. She never cooked for him. He always tell his best friend that he can't do it any longer. His heart hurts so much. She only talk to him when she need something. Yet, she still want to divorce with him. She know that she will never love him, rather than hurting his heart non-stop she will back off. He kneel down on his knees begging for her to take back what she have said. She want to go out of the house. He just said she can stay in the house and just let he go out of his own house.
Everyday he will sleep in the car to watch over her so that he knows that his wife safe being alone in the house. One day, on his way back home he saw his wife out from a car with another man. His best friend. He stops his car and just look at them with an empty mind. After all of this time he told his best friend about his feeling. How could he do this to him. Everything makes sense to him now. No wonder his best friend encouraged him to divorce just because he said he couldn't see he gets hurt. No wonder his wife want a divorce also.
His heart falls into pieces. Feels betrayed. He swear that he will never looked back. His pain is his wife happiness. He confront his wife and they finally divorce. He just hopes that his wife will be find her happiness that she never found before. Now, he will leave his past behind and never look back at his past. With a heart fulls of bloody scars, he accept the fact that you can't force someone to love you even though you love them unconditionally. Now, he just need to moves on with his life and maybe he will find someone that cure his heart and love him unconditionally. You can't have everything you want. You just need to move on.
xoxo, E.
Have you ever felt?
Have you ever felt so alone and nothing makes sense? Have you ever felt so down when everybody around you is so high up there? Have you ever felt so depressed because your parent have a high expectation on you? Have you ever felt that you just want everybody understand you just for once? Have you ever felt that you just want to cry and the world seems unfair for you? Have you ever felt that you just want happiness for once and the world never let you have it? That is what I felt all of this time.
I had been up there for once, well twice exactly. Just for a second that I want to feel how is it feel like, the world never let me to feel it. I'm in my darkest part of my life for a moment. Every time I want to keep my head up I just can't do it. Life is a cycle. There is time that you have the time of your life. But, don't ever forget there is also time when you just losing faith in hopes when you down there. Pain. Every second moving you feel like you making a huge mistake. When you just want someones to believes that you can do it but actually there is no one does.
They were there when you are at the center of the world. But, they were gone when you at the hardest time for the moment. They said they know how it is feel like but actually you know that they just want you to feel better. You said you're okay but deep inside you feel like if you can move somewhere that nobody knows you and expect nothing great from you, you really want to move there and forget all the problem. But, the fact is problem follows you everywhere you go. You just need to face it with a smile and keep strong.
I always remember what goes around comes around. It may takes time but great things will happen eventually. Be strong, keep strong and stay strong.
xoxo, E.
I had been up there for once, well twice exactly. Just for a second that I want to feel how is it feel like, the world never let me to feel it. I'm in my darkest part of my life for a moment. Every time I want to keep my head up I just can't do it. Life is a cycle. There is time that you have the time of your life. But, don't ever forget there is also time when you just losing faith in hopes when you down there. Pain. Every second moving you feel like you making a huge mistake. When you just want someones to believes that you can do it but actually there is no one does.
They were there when you are at the center of the world. But, they were gone when you at the hardest time for the moment. They said they know how it is feel like but actually you know that they just want you to feel better. You said you're okay but deep inside you feel like if you can move somewhere that nobody knows you and expect nothing great from you, you really want to move there and forget all the problem. But, the fact is problem follows you everywhere you go. You just need to face it with a smile and keep strong.
I always remember what goes around comes around. It may takes time but great things will happen eventually. Be strong, keep strong and stay strong.
xoxo, E.
Friday, June 7
Falling for you.
Here's in silence. I don't know what to do. I'm falling for you but I'm so afraid to tell you. I know we're friend, as in the matter of fact you are my best friend. I love our friendship but it's hurt so much to keep it all by myself. I've spending all day thinking how should I tell you that I like you. I am trying not to tell you but I want to. Scared of what you will say in response. So, I'm hiding what I'm feeling but I am so tired of holding this inside my head. I have been waiting all my life and now I have found you. As I'm standing here and you hold my hand, pull me towards you and we start to dance. All around us, I see nobody, it's just you and me. I hope you feel the same. If falling for you is a crime I rather stay in your prison of your love.
xoxo, E.
xoxo, E.
Thursday, March 21
When I Was Your Man
It has been a week since Lisa died. Goddamn I miss her. I should treat her well. It's hurts. I was wrong. It's too late. But, if I had a chance. Take Lisa to every party because she love to dance. Our song on the radio but it doesn't sound the same. My heart break a little when our friend talk about you. My pride, my ego and my selfish way. Full of regrets. Too young and too dumb to realize that I should bought her flower and held her.
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"Please Harris! Just this time. I promise! I really want to go with you." Lisa begging. I should go. But, now I never, never gonna see her again. It was a mistake. What am I thinking?! Why I'm so busy working. I should accompany her because she really love to dance. I should give all my hours. I still remember how happy she are when we go to Rissa birthday party at beach. She dance all night. Her body move with the music. Her move rhyme with the song. I just sat there and watch her dancing like a drunk person. She just loves dancing too much. I should have join her dancing. That's the last time I join her to go to party. After that, there's no more party that I go with here because I'm too busy with the new project. She keep on calling me to accompany her for breakfast, lunch or dinner. I rarely see her because I'm too busy. When she sulk, I just asked the florist to send flower to her office. She's quit cool about it. She just call me and said thanks. Now, I know that she keep her feelings all of this while.
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It's been along night. Just sitting here trying not to look back. I'm scared to death. What if by the time flies I will forget Lisa. No! I don't want to. Can I just live in my memories with her? Everyone keep on telling me to move on. Can't you guys understand me? I have been with Lisa for 10 years! We have been date since middle school. She is my life. Now, half of me was gone and never come back. I'm so sad. I play When I Was Your Man using this guitar that Lisa give me during our 5th anniversary. She always asked me to play her some song before she sleep. I miss those moments! There maybe not be another one like her out there. Let me just live here alone. Cherish every moment with Lisa. They said that time will heals everything but they don't know you and scars you give. Lisa meant everything to me. If heartache is a physical pain I could face but it's hurting me from inside of my head I can't take it. I gonna lose my mind. Why did you left me alone Lisa.
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I remember that her eyes so bright. When I first met her, I'm so in love that night. She's wearing floral short dress with her hair moving along with the wind. She's so beautiful. Until now, I can remember her face really well. I can't take it. Lisa is perfect even when she cried. When I look into her eyes. It's like watching the night skies or a beautiful sunrise. I'd give up forever to see you. All I can taste is this moment and I can breath is your life. Lisa is like an oxygen to me. How can I live if there was no oxygen? How can I live without you Lisa. I need you honey. I really do. I wish I can turn back time. I don't want the world to see me. I don't think that they'd understand.When everything's made to be broken. I just want you Lisa. Stand by my side. Through this wild world. I'm still alive but barely breathing.
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Now I' never, never get to clean up the messed I made. And I haunts me every time I closed my eyes. Although it's hurts, I'll be the first to say that I was wrong. I know that I was too late. To try and apologize for my mistake. But, I want you to know. I hope I can bought you flowers and held your hands once again. cherish every moment with you. My love Lisa. My life Lisa. My soul Lisa.
xoxo, E.
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"Please Harris! Just this time. I promise! I really want to go with you." Lisa begging. I should go. But, now I never, never gonna see her again. It was a mistake. What am I thinking?! Why I'm so busy working. I should accompany her because she really love to dance. I should give all my hours. I still remember how happy she are when we go to Rissa birthday party at beach. She dance all night. Her body move with the music. Her move rhyme with the song. I just sat there and watch her dancing like a drunk person. She just loves dancing too much. I should have join her dancing. That's the last time I join her to go to party. After that, there's no more party that I go with here because I'm too busy with the new project. She keep on calling me to accompany her for breakfast, lunch or dinner. I rarely see her because I'm too busy. When she sulk, I just asked the florist to send flower to her office. She's quit cool about it. She just call me and said thanks. Now, I know that she keep her feelings all of this while.
_________________________________________________________________________________
It's been along night. Just sitting here trying not to look back. I'm scared to death. What if by the time flies I will forget Lisa. No! I don't want to. Can I just live in my memories with her? Everyone keep on telling me to move on. Can't you guys understand me? I have been with Lisa for 10 years! We have been date since middle school. She is my life. Now, half of me was gone and never come back. I'm so sad. I play When I Was Your Man using this guitar that Lisa give me during our 5th anniversary. She always asked me to play her some song before she sleep. I miss those moments! There maybe not be another one like her out there. Let me just live here alone. Cherish every moment with Lisa. They said that time will heals everything but they don't know you and scars you give. Lisa meant everything to me. If heartache is a physical pain I could face but it's hurting me from inside of my head I can't take it. I gonna lose my mind. Why did you left me alone Lisa.
_________________________________________________________________________________
I remember that her eyes so bright. When I first met her, I'm so in love that night. She's wearing floral short dress with her hair moving along with the wind. She's so beautiful. Until now, I can remember her face really well. I can't take it. Lisa is perfect even when she cried. When I look into her eyes. It's like watching the night skies or a beautiful sunrise. I'd give up forever to see you. All I can taste is this moment and I can breath is your life. Lisa is like an oxygen to me. How can I live if there was no oxygen? How can I live without you Lisa. I need you honey. I really do. I wish I can turn back time. I don't want the world to see me. I don't think that they'd understand.When everything's made to be broken. I just want you Lisa. Stand by my side. Through this wild world. I'm still alive but barely breathing.
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Now I' never, never get to clean up the messed I made. And I haunts me every time I closed my eyes. Although it's hurts, I'll be the first to say that I was wrong. I know that I was too late. To try and apologize for my mistake. But, I want you to know. I hope I can bought you flowers and held your hands once again. cherish every moment with you. My love Lisa. My life Lisa. My soul Lisa.
xoxo, E.
Exam's Over!
Yo! Ssup! Exam week is officially over. Failed my Add Math! That's for sure. I didn't answer almost half of the paper. Let's just say I didn't answer half of the paper! I don't care at all. I hope the other paper pass. Not aiming any A's at all! So, don't ask me how's my exam. Not gonna answer that type of question.
So, Cody will end his tour at Barca. The Wanted live in LA! Goddamn! Their house is so amazing! Classic and simple. My dream house. Errmm. Xperia Z released last Friday. Since I got 1K already, I need to save up to 1K more. And, I also decided to buy Sony SmartWatch. Can't wait to have both of it!
I have one week holiday. Too lazy to study. Can't wait for this Friday! Swimming with F and S! Weee. And, I also can't wait for this Sunday! Bowling time with cousins! Gonna have a good time. *Carly Rae Jepsen mood on* Lol. Hahaha.
So, live you life. And, enjoy it to the fullest! Live like you gonna die tomorrow!
xoxo, E.
So, Cody will end his tour at Barca. The Wanted live in LA! Goddamn! Their house is so amazing! Classic and simple. My dream house. Errmm. Xperia Z released last Friday. Since I got 1K already, I need to save up to 1K more. And, I also decided to buy Sony SmartWatch. Can't wait to have both of it!
I have one week holiday. Too lazy to study. Can't wait for this Friday! Swimming with F and S! Weee. And, I also can't wait for this Sunday! Bowling time with cousins! Gonna have a good time. *Carly Rae Jepsen mood on* Lol. Hahaha.
So, live you life. And, enjoy it to the fullest! Live like you gonna die tomorrow!
xoxo, E.
Sunday, March 3
Word of wisdom from USD!
USD is one of my favorite book. It's a Malay novel actually. Okay. Let's get started! :)
Eat right. Don't smoke. Don't drink. Exercise daily. Stay fit. Die anyway!
Lie, one is sweet to mind.
Lie, two is a killer to heart.
Lie, three is a poison to blossom rose.
Final lie is a heart break. Falling petals and thorns endure all the pain to the broken heart.
Have you ever felt so alone and nothing makes sense? Well, that's how I feel right now. I feel like I'm facing everything myself, with nothing but tears and fake smiles.
You can't even keep me away from sin, the simplest sin, how can you ever keep me away from the world so wild?
Hold strong. Sometimes, love just ain't enough.
Just go with the flow. Thinking beyond line won't change anything.
Every beautiful girl has that dumb guy that did her wrong and make her strong.
As long as the mood is right. The person i am with is right. The place is right. The time is right. I'm alright then.
Nice quotes right? Enjoy!
xoxo, E.
Eat right. Don't smoke. Don't drink. Exercise daily. Stay fit. Die anyway!
Lie, one is sweet to mind.
Lie, two is a killer to heart.
Lie, three is a poison to blossom rose.
Final lie is a heart break. Falling petals and thorns endure all the pain to the broken heart.
Have you ever felt so alone and nothing makes sense? Well, that's how I feel right now. I feel like I'm facing everything myself, with nothing but tears and fake smiles.
You can't even keep me away from sin, the simplest sin, how can you ever keep me away from the world so wild?
Hold strong. Sometimes, love just ain't enough.
Just go with the flow. Thinking beyond line won't change anything.
Every beautiful girl has that dumb guy that did her wrong and make her strong.
As long as the mood is right. The person i am with is right. The place is right. The time is right. I'm alright then.
Nice quotes right? Enjoy!
xoxo, E.
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